Showing posts with label counsellor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label counsellor. Show all posts

Tuesday, November 20

Reality Check Text Message Counselling Services

Here at Meat, Inc. it's important to check your bad attitude at the door. Life's too short and you're a bitch ass for complaining. So let's get down with a text message counselling services offered as one of our many complimentary services.

Client:"I was on FIAH last night. Getting cruised left and right, and finally bagged a hot choreographer boy I've been lusting over for two years. Go motherfucking me."

Meat, Inc.:"Hell yea. Sounds like my kinda party night. I just got sucked off at the house of pash. I could use some nerdy boys with 9inch kacks."

Client:"Did you get some hot Mark mouth?"

Meat, Inc.:"Sick. No. Security guard from University Hts."

Client:"You are such a WHORE. where does he guard?"

Meat, Inc.:"The Jewish Community Center"

Client:"Oh good lord, was he black?"

Meat, Inc.:"White as the driven snow. From Ashtabula no less."

Client:"I can't have sex like that anymore"

Meat, Inc.:"With white people? Geeez man. I know they say 'you never go back'... but it's just a figure of speech."

Client:"No, the HIV talk is too much for the average young gay guy so I don't have anonymous sex w/cute boys like that anymore. BTW the choreographer is white from SD"

Meat, Inc.:"Nice. It's not like I'm going around barebacking the city of Cleveland. I'm not checking people's papers either, what's a hooker to do?"

Client:"Didn't mean it like that. Most guys can't handle the HIV even being safe. So I don't even try anymore. That's all, nothing to do with you ;-)"

Meat, Inc.:"Oh. Serosorting? U just don't practice safer sex?"

Client:"I serosort because I usually get rejected if I don't. And it's easier just to beat off anyway. Zero bullshit."

Meat, Inc.:"True that. I can see that issue being a factor for anyone. It would definitely slow down sluttitude. I'm feeling randy, but also like settling down. Whormonal."

Client:"Yea, I'd try to date this guy Scott but it'd end in disaster stemming from his self-loathing. So I'll just be a load sponge and munch on his gorgeous ass."

Meat, Inc.:"Macaroni."

Client:"I've abandoned all future love prospects (in exchage) for self-enforced singledom. Nobody gets close anymore"

Meat, Inc.:"Ugh. You sound like you're wearing bad eye liner right now. But I know the feeling - Keep whats mine for me type thing."

Client:"LOL... no eyeliner, but my heart's been broken way too many times. Love isn't an option anymore. My heart is protected by a fortress now. Nobody gets in. Period."

Client:"And I have to remind myself of that when someone shows interest in me."

Meat, Inc.:"Yea. That works in some ways. But at least you still have to remind yourself of that. There's other ways to love people anyhow."

Client:"It's self-preservation, as unhappy as it sometimes makes me in the short-term. It's worth it though."

Client:"I show love in other ways. Usually through compassion and companionship. But as soon as someone tries to break into my fortress... they're kicked away"

Client:"Makes my mom sad though. She still has hope, even if I've abandoned it. Yikes! Downer!"

Meat, Inc.:"Yea. That can leave a path of devastation in your wake. I can see where the "Don't shit where you eat" doctrine comes in handy"

Client:"Oh yes... It's sage advice"

Client:"At any rate I'm glad you have fun with the Ashtabula Jew guard :-) I beat off last night and that's my Monday highlight. LOL"

Meat, Inc.:"I thought there was a dancer in there somewhere?"

Client:"ever listen to KFOG online? Such a cool station"

Client:"No... he got pushed away. I didn't feel like having sex last night."

Client:"Besides I didn't want to think about being poz for awhile. Not feeling like a biohazard was more important than ejaculating."

Meat, Inc.:"Yea. Geeez. I wish I was out there to allay your emotude."

Client:"Wish u were here too. It's really foggy and dreary... my favorite. No shadows anywhere. Very etherial."

Meat, Inc.:"Oh. You are really in need of some lovin'"

Client:"Self-love is what I get these days."

Meat, Inc.:"Yea. The only problem with doing things by yourself is that you're alone."

Client:"Besides this Scott kat has a ripped bod, a 10" cock, and a rock hard muscle ass. I'd be hyper aware of my titties and tummy which would make me funky & loathy."

Meat, Inc.:"On trust me. You sound loathy enough already."

Client:"And wonder why the hell he's showing interest in me... it makes no sense and is illogical. Oh I love myself just fine... I'm just realistic about who I am."

Meat, Inc.:"That's another problem with doin' your own thing. You cant see from any other perspective than your own."

Client:"Besides I've been a loner since I went to elementary school. Most people irritated me back then. The fog is making me funky I think."

Client:"How is that a problem?"

Meat, Inc.:"Uh.. You can't see the big picture. You believe things to be true instead of proving them to be."

Client:"How so? I understand what you're saying, just not how that would apply here. Explain."

Meat, Inc.:"People wanna buy what you're sellin. You're a hit with the gays. But the fact that you only offer a limited preview seems almost selfish."

Client:"It's not that I loathe myself, I don't. I'm just realistic about who and what I am and don't put on airs indicating otherwise."

Client:"I don't sell it, I give it away :-)"

Client:"thanks for the talk/reality check"